{"id":27945,"date":"2023-04-25T22:06:00","date_gmt":"2023-04-26T02:06:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/irishexaminerusa.com\/wp\/?p=27945"},"modified":"2023-04-25T22:06:02","modified_gmt":"2023-04-26T02:06:02","slug":"kittay-house-in-the-bronx-is-an-independent-living-center-with-a-smart-humane-approach-to-aging","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/irishexaminerusa.com\/wp\/?p=27945","title":{"rendered":"Kittay House in The Bronx is an Independent Living Center With a Smart, Humane Approach to Aging"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
\"\"<\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n

Report by Mike Greenly

During the spring holidays, the notion of survival, perseverance and redemption comes to mind. With that, it seems like a good time to share with the world at large my personal experience with dramatic life changes. As we head further into spring and summer, heavy-duty changes are something I’ve been living through dramatically.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Less than a year ago, I sold a two-bedroom \u201cco-op\u201d apartment in one of the fanciest neighborhoods of Manhattan — Sutton Place South by the East River. For those who don\u2019t know, a co-op (\u201ccooperative home\u201d) is a multi-family piece of real estate in which a business holds title to the property. It\u2019s not owned by the people who live there. Residents, instead, gain equity by buying \u201cshares\u201d of ownership without possessing a deed.

It was a privileged place to live and I was there for over three decades. When my famous DJ husband died of lung cancer — unable to give up his addiction to cigarettes — I sold the apartment shares to my next-door neighbors who expanded their apartment into mine. I intended to buy shares for a smaller space in the same building. Tragically, however, I was tricked out of the profits that would have made a move possible to my own place. But that\u2019s a story for another time and an extended tale-telling.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I was soon to be literally homeless, no longer owning a place to live. Fortunately, my younger brother, Robert — living near Boston \u2013\u2013 came to my rescue in New York. Together, we researched local living spaces for older people. The best choice we concluded was Kittay House, where I am now. It\u2019s just one among several senior care locations in Manhattan, the Bronx, Westchester county and even some options for care from home. Check out https:\/\/jewishhome.org\/locations\/<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

I’ve chosen to share this story for the benefit of older people and their families everywhere. I hope this explanation will help you be better able to evaluate places for any older people that you may have to consider, for yourself or someone you love. The need for elderly residences will only grow. I\u2019m 78. But all of us are part of an aging population across the globe and including the USA.\u00a0

The U.S. Census Bureau projects that by 2034, just 19 years from now, the number of adults over 65 will outnumber children under 18. That trend — the aging of American humanity — is expected to continue. By 2060, nearly 95 million of us will be over age 65 and only 80 million under 18.

And now, as I write these words after 78 years on the planet, I find that I\u2019m living a paradox. On the one hand, I\u2019m astonished to be that old. On the other hand, I\u2019m fortunate not to feel that old. But that\u2019s just part of my good luck. That brings me to\u00a0Kittay\u00a0House \u2014 a place I\u2019m lucky to have found on Webb Avenue in the Bronx, NY.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It opened in 1970 and is supported by an organization called The New Jewish Home but it serves a broad diversity of elderly people. Indeed, I regularly interact with a number of friendly Catholic nuns who live here with me, too.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The organization manages a number of different locations. This is the one I now know first-hand. Because I\u2019ve been impressed by the spirit of the place and its people, I sought some of their perspectives for any reader anywhere who may someday need to find a helpful and supportive facility for a \u201csenior\u201d like me. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

A distinction you might find helpful. Kittay House is an \u201cindependent\u201d living community. It is not a nursing home, providing medical and personal care in a clinical setting. Nor is it an assisted living residence which also includes some medical support.

Independent living communities primarily focus on serving the social needs of residents, many of whom are able to live independently without much support. I consider myself fortunate in being able to manage the activities of my own daily life.

In order to share a broader perspective with you, I\u2019ve constructed brief profiles about just a few of the many folks I\u2019ve encountered at Kittay House. First off, some members of the overall management here provided me with their insights.

I\u2019ll begin with Associate Director, Susan Brown-Mandel. Her first significant interactions with an aging population came when she worked at an art supply and framing shop. She was intrigued to find a lot of customers in their 80\u2019s who\u2019d only recently begun to paint. As she explained, \u201cIt was fascinating and inspiring to see how people can continue to grow and adapt in their senior years.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Since joining Kittay\u2019s management for its 180 residents, Susan has seen first-hand the importance of community. \u201cIt means a lot to me,\u201d she added, “that with the right community around them, they\u2019ll live longer and happier lives.\u201d

I\u2019ve already benefited, myself, from Susan\u2019s friendly support. Kittay House residents have our own \u201cBoard of Directors\u201d with officers elected by the tenants. When the current Board President, George Kaplan, learned that I\u2019m a writer, he asked me to work with other board members to create a \u201ctenant to tenant\u201d directory \u2014 a listing of residents who\u2019d like to share information about their interests (chess, music, etc.) with others here. I volunteered to be the typist, but Susan has been wonderfully helpful in getting the input forms printed and submitted to all residents. 

Another supportive member of the staff is Therapeutic Recreation Supervisor Ruth Maderski. She has worked at Kittay House going on three years. She is touched with empathy when she learns a resident is missing a previous capability, like driving a car. But she\u2019s heartened when she observes the comfort and even excitement that occurs when a resident makes new friendships or discovers a new pleasure like an activity or trip provided for the residents here. She loves hearing someone say, \u201cI\u2019m so glad I can still do this!\u201d Or, \u201cIt\u2019s great to be learning something new!\u201d 

Ruth\u2019s work here has raised her own awareness of the need to think and plan ahead about one\u2019s own aging and personal destiny.  She noted, \u201cI\u2019m thinking about my own future now more wisely.\u201d

Marketing Manager Lillian Negroni has been with Kittay House for 17 years in different capacities. After about five years, she was offered the marketing position because of the ways she had gotten residents to participate and enjoy various programs. She\u2019s experienced sadness over the years as residents she\u2019d come to love have passed away. Being here has made her think more actively about not hanging on to \u201cthings\u201d in her own life and home but, instead, focusing more on relationships and planning ahead.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

She\u2019s also observed the importance for anyone needing an aide in senior care for whom the role is not just a job but an expression of a sincere wish to improve someone else\u2019s life. Lillian\u2019s desire is to help every resident feel at home. As she said, \u201cKnowing I can be helpful to our residents is deeply satisfying to me, personally.\u201d\u00a0

Now to the dining room. One of the things I enjoy about the meals here is that they\u2019re all included. They tend to be healthy but tasty and there\u2019s always a choice. For perspective, I spoke to the dining room manager.

During Dining Food & Nutrition Manager Angela Camnero\u2019s five years at\u00a0Kittay\u00a0House, she has experienced what it feels like to get attached to tenants, prepare meals for them daily and sometimes to their caring family visitors, but then lose them to illness or even just old age. She is heartened, she says, when she can tell that the efforts of her and her staff are appreciated.

During the height of the COVID 19 pandemic, the dining room had to be closed and meals were delivered individually to the residents in their rooms. She was touched by the outpouring of gratitude expressed by so many. In serving the taste and nutritional needs of\u00a0Kittay\u00a0House tenants, she strives to treat them the way she would wish her grandparents (still living in the Dominican Republic) would be treated if they were here.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Next I spoke to two workers here. Staying in the dining room, I chatted with food service worker Anthony Francis, the delightful waiter who brings fresh lunches and dinners to the table. Originally from Barbados, he has a charming accent and an always radiant smile. He\u2019s long believed that aging is a gift from God, with elderly people deserving the same personal attention and caring we get as infants. 

\u201cOnce a Man, Twice a Child,\u201d he says as he quotes the title of a song by American rapper, Nas. Twice in his two decades at Kittay House, Anthony has used the Heimlich maneuver to rescue diners from choking. He\u2019s definitely among the reasons I\u2019m glad my brother found this place where I\u2019ll safely be growing older.

Other workers include health aides like Dora McClary. During a quarter century here, Dora has found that working with older people has made her better able to offer loving support not only to her own aging mother but to her children and everyone else in the world, too. 

Dora recalls one woman \u2014 Leona \u2014 who became a \u201csecond mother\u201d for eight years until she passed. Dora takes pleasure in being useful to older people in diverse ways, from helping them stay on track with medications to helping them take a shower. I\u2019ve come to know a number of the aides here and have been struck to discover that the passion Dora finds in helping old people is widely shared among the staff.

To anyone looking for a \u201csenior\u201d residence for themselves or others, I\u2019d suggest that if possible you get to meet and talk with a staff member or two. If you sense a genuinely sincere level of personal caring about older people, that can only be a good sign.

And for that perspective, I\u2019m citing just a few fellow residents among the many friends I\u2019ve been making here. One of them, Myrna Goggins, has been a resident at Kittay House for three and a half years \u2014 much less than some, but much longer than myself. Having chosen the place for her sister-in-law a few years ago, she had already researched facilities for seniors and liked the way it was run. 

As we chatted about the place one day, she mentioned that both of her parents were Irish and that she\u2019d grown up steeped in the belief that treating older people with respect and support is a crucial value in life. She\u2019s heard \u201cSl\u00e1inte\u201d thousands of times, she says, and the idea of supporting good health had been steeped in her since childhood. Among the activities she enjoys here are participating in the choir, chair yoga, aerobic dance and other exercise classes and even the prospect of gardening. She adds with a smile, \u201cIt\u2019s a safe and pleasant place to grow older.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It was easy to become friends with fellow resident Matthew Richardson. He\u2019s an open and straightforward guy. He came here needing a walker for the fibromyalgia that made his movement slow and uncomfortable. But he had a wonderfully positive attitude and was invigorated by his work representing Panax ginseng. That\u2019s a famous Asian herb that helps reduce stresses on the body — like inflammation and the effects of aging.

\u201cAside from feeling a generally enhanced sense of my own wellbeing since taking it,\u201d Matthew said, \u201cI\u2019ve been touched by two people I know who purchased it through me after I introduced it to them. One is a woman who was suffering from breast cancer. I was proud that, after she started taking my ginseng, her doctor discovered that it was actually improving her condition. Something similar happened with a friend I\u2019ve known for years. After he became a user, his tumors showed improvement.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n


I was so impressed with what I learned that I now take the capsules myself, arranging through Matthew to have them delivered to me every month. It invigorates me to see him actively pursue his business even if he can\u2019t walk without using a device. He perseveres as he lives out his passion to improve people\u2019s health. His site is www.richmatt.binghan.com<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

One other interesting resident among the people I now call friends is Tom Porton. He arrived after the lasting repercussions of open heart surgery. Today, he uses a walker to safely get around. He had a terrible experience at a different facility \u2014 a nursing home also in the Bronx. He intends to write a book about how negligent and inattentive the other crew had been. Hearing of his experience made me feel fortunate to be where I am. It also motivated me to write this report to help others choosing a facility be more aware of what to look for.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In sum, I\u2019ve found the spirit of\u00a0Kittay\u00a0House to be positive and supportive of myself as an older person. I\u2019m sure there are many worthy organizations across the country. My hope in sharing this information is perhaps to be of help to anyone looking for an older person\u2019s residency.\u00a0

Since I can tell you first-hand that\u00a0Kittay\u00a0house is a wonderfully helpful place for me to be at my age, perhaps the attitudes you\u2019ve felt reflected in the above will help you know what to look for whenever you need a facility anywhere in the U.S.A.

I\u2019ll close with an Irish proverb that inspires me: \u201cThe older the fiddle the sweeter the tune.\u201d It helps to be a \u201csweet tune\u201d if your instrument is well taken care of. Here\u2019s wishing for you and yours the happiest aging and circumstances possible.<\/p>\n

Share this:<\/h3>